Nananana Naeha

[Naeha]

Hi guys! 

Long time no see. 

My decision tonight depends completely on a game of Duck, Duck, Goose. With the help of random.org, YOU could be the winner of Naeha's vote! Let's start.

Duck...

Duck...

SPOILER: Click to show

I'm kidding, obviously. Can you imagine, though? Lying to someone and saying that their fate depended on random.org? Crazy. Anyway, let's get down to business. I have a feeling you're already gonna get an earful from everyone else, so I'll try to keep this relatively short. 

Steve - You know, I was incredibly fond of you while we were in the game together. You were probably the person I had the most fun talking to, even more than the people I was aligned with, because you were one of the few that knew how to keep a conversation going that wasn't completely game oriented. I felt like you were someone that I opened up to and showed a side of me that almost no one else saw in this game. Don't get me wrong, it's not like we were sharing deep dark secrets with one another, but our relationship felt very...personal, to the point where I really wanted to move forward with you and find a way to make things work. Personally, I felt like we had each other's backs. I had absolutely no interest in putting you up, and I felt like that was mutual. When you became HOH and told me I had nothing to worry about, you validated those feelings, only to slap me in the face 24 hours later by putting me up with no legitimate explanation as to why. It was incredibly hurtful, mostly because the entire process you put me through felt entirely unnecessary. I don't see what you gained from making the biggest target in the house feel comfortable only to immediately betray her. So, my question is this: What was your thought process during the week Libra went home? I'd really like a detailed play-by-play of what you were thinking. 

Shelli - You and I had a really interesting relationship. I feel like we enjoyed each other's company and never acted upon it, so I wasn't ENTIRELY surprised that I was sent home during your HOH. Now that I know how close you and Liz were, it makes sense that I was your target. However, I can't help but think about all the sleep lost the night before you put me up as the replacement nom. I stayed up until almost 5 o'clock in the morning begging you not to put me up, and there was never a point in that conversation where you stopped me. There is a time and a place to be direct with people. That was one of them. We both had work the following morning, it was common knowledge that I would go home if you put me up, and there was virtually nothing I could expose or do to save myself/screw you over if you had simply just ended the conversation and told me that you were most likely putting me up. You would have saved both of us from looking like Steve Buscemi the following morning if you had just been upfront with me rather than leading me on and making me think I had a shot at staying. My question for you is this: Was letting the conversation we had drag on as late as it did worth it in the end? I'm not asking you if putting me up was worth it, I'm asking if you considered the conversation that led up to that decision productive. 


Anyway, that's it from me. Sorry for bringing up old news, I just figured now would be a great time to get some closure. Congratulations on making it to the end, you two. Ultimately, you deserve to be here! 

[Shelli Poole]

Aug 8, 2016 17:25:14 GMT Naeha said:

SPOILER: Click to show

Shelli - You and I had a really interesting relationship. I feel like we enjoyed each other's company and never acted upon it, so I wasn't ENTIRELY surprised that I was sent home during your HOH. Now that I know how close you and Liz were, it makes sense that I was your target. However, I can't help but think about all the sleep lost the night before you put me up as the replacement nom. I stayed up until almost 5 o'clock in the morning begging you not to put me up, and there was never a point in that conversation where you stopped me. There is a time and a place to be direct with people. That was one of them. We both had work the following morning, it was common knowledge that I would go home if you put me up, and there was virtually nothing I could expose or do to save myself/screw you over if you had simply just ended the conversation and told me that you were most likely putting me up. You would have saved both of us from looking like Steve Buscemi the following morning if you had just been upfront with me rather than leading me on and making me think I had a shot at staying. My question for you is this: Was letting the conversation we had drag on as late as it did worth it in the end? I'm not asking you if putting me up was worth it, I'm asking if you considered the conversation that led up to that decision productive. 


Anyway, that's it from me. Sorry for bringing up old news, I just figured now would be a great time to get some closure. Congratulations on making it to the end, you two. Ultimately, you deserve to be here! 

Hey Naeha! It is nice to see you again, lol! I agree with your assessment of our relationship. I think I felt that we liked each other but just never made anything official. There was good reason for that since we were both in other alliances.

I honestly was not trying to string you along that night. Throughout this gave, through every single one of my HOH's, I went through every possible scenario when trying to decide who to put up, including re-noms. So, while you were definitely my most likely re-nom candidate, I still felt like I should talk to you and look at every option before I made my decision. I completely get why it was a waste of your time and I'm sorry about that. Still lol.

Also, I woke up late and didn't have a chance to talk to you before my deadline. Actually, I thought I didn't know about my deadline until after we had talked but, looking back, I think I did and just thought I had more time to talk and overthink! But, you are right that I should have just told you - normally I was pretty good about making sure I had a chance to warn somebody before nominating them. I'm sorry I was careless with you. And no, it was obviously not productive lol. It was just me being dumb and thoughtless while drinking wine. Not the first time.

Thank you for your question!

[Steve]

Aug 8, 2016 17:25:14 GMT Naeha said:

Steve - You know, I was incredibly fond of you while we were in the game together. You were probably the person I had the most fun talking to, even more than the people I was aligned with, because you were one of the few that knew how to keep a conversation going that wasn't completely game oriented. I felt like you were someone that I opened up to and showed a side of me that almost no one else saw in this game. Don't get me wrong, it's not like we were sharing deep dark secrets with one another, but our relationship felt very...personal, to the point where I really wanted to move forward with you and find a way to make things work. Personally, I felt like we had each other's backs. I had absolutely no interest in putting you up, and I felt like that was mutual. When you became HOH and told me I had nothing to worry about, you validated those feelings, only to slap me in the face 24 hours later by putting me up with no legitimate explanation as to why. It was incredibly hurtful, mostly because the entire process you put me through felt entirely unnecessary. I don't see what you gained from making the biggest target in the house feel comfortable only to immediately betray her. So, my question is this: What was your thought process during the week Libra went home? I'd really like a detailed play-by-play of what you were thinking. 

No.

Just kidding. Let’s get into it. But I am gonna warn you. My answer will probably not want to make you vote for me, if there was even a little inkling of you considering it before this. In all fairness though, you asked, so, why the hell wouldn't I be straightforward now?

CASS + STEVE BECOMES HOHs
I immediately congratulated her, despite me not really being on the best of terms with her. It's not that I didn't like her, it was just that we didn't click, and we did better when being sarcastic to each other. When thinking about nominations, I wanted to do Kathy and Kelsey, no question. She got to nominate first, and she was very adamant about wanting Shelli and Kelsey up. I brought up the idea of splitting them up, for two reasons. The first was I wanted to nominate Kelsey, we didn't talk a ton of game, and she literally got zero on that endurance. The second reason was that no offense Kelsey, but you sucked at competitions then, and I was worried about Shelli being nominated next to her, and potentially going home. I finally convinced her it was a good idea to split them up, and then she stopped listening. She said she wanted Becky and Arlie up on both sides. and I could nominate Arlie and Shelli. Obviously, I was like fuck that. I brought up the idea of I want to nominate Kathy, she seemed to agree. Then later on, tried to push that Arlie needed to go up, not Kathy. Which kind of annoyed me, but just made me tell her to do whatever she wanted. So I had to find two nominees. When I told you were safe, I meant it (I mean- Obviously I didn't, but at the time, I was dead set on you staying.)






NOMINATIONS - THE FIGHT
I decided I would throw up Kathy, first and foremost. She talked the least to me, while always being online and did really well in competitions. I needed to take the shot. Finding someone to next to her was difficult. I still remembered my week two idea of saying random.org, mostly in an attempt to piss people off. I talked to Libra about going up, she said whatever, but Howard messaged me and said she was asking him to ask me not to put her up. I clocked that she was closer to Howard than the current hoh, and I figured if me and Howard were ever put up (I never hid my allegiance to him), she would definitely be one vote to evict me, over him. So that clocked in as a good idea for my nominations. Having decided that, I spent the day trying to get other people to go into the house chat (I kept requesting a house chat with everyone so there could be fights and house meetings) and posting their nomination ideas for everyone to see. I figured it would show me in the house was willing to show their gameplay, since a lot of the house stuck to being behind the scenes and not saying anything publicly bad about the other person. I wanted to see who the other potential wildcards were. Also, I knew once someone would throw out a name, that person would respond and it would start up a fight. And by God, it did. It showed me how Libra could verbally throw down if needed to, it showed me that you would stick up for yourself (Even when it was one on two) and it finally showed me that James had a limited view on the game, and it was clear what side of the house he was falling under. That's why I was keen on working with him. As long as he was in the house, he'd be going before me. Anyway, nominations happened. Shelli/Kelsey vs. Kathy/Libra.





BATTLE OF THE BLOCK
Aaaaaaaand Shelli and Kelsey won. I didn't want that. I wanted to be dethroned so I could compete for hoh next week, and i could work on saving Shelli. Part of the reason I told K/L i nominated them was that they would win battle of the block. I believed that. So I'm already like shit. Kathy needs to go. There's no way she can win veto. Otherwise I'm fucked.



THE POWER OF VETO
I was fucked. What I thought would be a week of "oh i random.org'd it" "no u didn't" "oh u right anyway i'm not hoh anymore" turned into what I can only describe as a Limp Bizkit album. Total shit. When thinking of nominations, my two thoughts were Cass and James. I had promised Cass not to backdoor her when we won, and I didn't want to do what James did the previous week. I was heavily considering putting up James, falling in line with you nominating him publicly, and then I made.. to be honest, the mistake of talking to someone about it. I kept to myself that week with a lot of things, mostly did my own thing and dropped small things by my allies to make sure they wouldn't be pissed. I talked to Howard during my lunch break at work before the renomination ceremony. I was pretty deadset on putting up James, but I'm man enough to admit that Howard's a really good player, and he got in my ear and convinced me taking you out was the best option, with Kathy off the block. I felt dirty about it, and I knew it was really douchey, but I did it. Not out of some huge game move of me trying to get you out of the house. It was me taking a moment to not listen to myself and instead listening to someone else, and while he was right in what he said and why you were a target, he wasn't privy to our conversations and budding connection. And I listened to him when I shouldn't have. I know that's not the answer I should be giving. I should be saying how I did "what was best for my game" and "no hard feelings but it needed to be done". It didn't need to be done, absolutely not. It wasn't best for my game either. I had another moment of tunnel vision and was more worried about my allies than myself. Something I corrected after that week, and blatantly made official the week Kelsey won HOH and got out Liz. 


EVICTION
At that point, I knew I lost your trust, and I knew Libra probably didn't have any for me either. So when people asked who I wanted to leave. I was up in the air and said it didn't matter, whoever as long as it wasn't me. I think we all know what happened after that, and the following week, I made a choice to attempt to rebuild a conversation with you again. Not in a strategic gameplay way, I just wanted it to be clear that I knew I fucked up, and that entire mess of a week, was something that I didn't try to hide. I embraced it, I learned from it, and while I do think I made mistake after mistake that round, that round was the most important one for me, because it kept myself in check and forced myself to start putting my thoughts and actions first. And while at the end of the day, I did consider Libra winning a small victory (Especially after that week, I would've been on her hit list, and 100% she would've voted to get rid of me if i next to Howard or anyone else she was semi close to), I do get that entire week was a loss. And I took the L and wore it like a badge of shame, so I wouldn't make another mistake so outlandishly silly again.


That was as detailed as I feel I can be. I think I had sushi the night of the BOTB if you needed more. I do apologize for everything that went down that, and while I 100% don't expect you to vote for me to win after doing you bad like that, I can't lie, I still hope you will consider it. Thank you for the chance for me to explain myself to you.